BFF
by Cream Pudding
Summary: Roxas has it bad for Axel. He knows he does, and he's willing to do whatever it takes to get his mind off of it. He takes it too far, but the biggest mistake he's ever made produces the best outcome he could have ever imagined. AKUROKU - Axel/Roxas - Modern AU - Smut - PWP


**Author Notes:** Very explicit content below. Sexual frustration, sex toys, furious masturbation.

 **BFF**

Summary:

 _Roxas has it bad for Axel. He knows he does, and he's willing to do whatever it takes to get his mind off of it. He takes it too far, but the biggest mistake he's ever made produces the best outcome he could have ever imagined._

* * *

Roxas lived a pretty simple life in his college dorm room, which he shared with Axel. Roxas had only known Axel for that year, but he already considered him his best friend, and Axel considered Roxas his bestie too. They got on that well together.

From spending weekends procrastinating by skateboarding everywhere, to liking the same dumb b-grade Japanese kaiju movies, to mutually hating on country and western music, but loving classic blues tracks.

Roxas hated cooking. Axel loved it. He'd always cook delicious meals and make Roxas taste test from a spoon or his finger.

Axel was clumsy as fuck, but Roxas was perfectly capable of disinfecting and suturing up small, but deep gashes Axel got on his limbs.

They were an odd bunch, but they just fit. They made more sense together than apart, and they both had known it from day one.

That was their universal truth.

Unfortunately for Roxas, he became aware of how much more he would like to 'fit together' with Axel, one afternoon in spring. He was on the couch of their shared living space, laughing his ass off at something ridiculous on the television. He yelled for Axel to get his butt out of the bathroom to watch it before it ended. Axel had rushed out, stood before Roxas and laughed until he cried, which had caused him to drop his towel.

Roxas had stared at his clumsy best friend, who had blushed as crimson as his hair. A stammered apology and nervous laugh were given, and Axel wrapped himself back up.

But it had been too late for Roxas. It had spelled his doom, because he had seen Axel's fine ass cheeks, and that massive cock burned its way into Roxas' retinas and imagination. Of course, he had given Axel shit for it, teasing him by wondering about how Axel found pants big enough for himself, and how he would never need a crutch if he ever broke one of his legs, but man… the more Roxas thought about it the more he wondered what it must be like to have such a massive dong… what it must be like to fuck someone with it… what it must be like to _be fucked_ by it.

The thought made him uncomfortable. It made him tease Axel more until Axel teased right back that Roxas should just show Axel his micro-penis.

Of course, Roxas didn't have a micro-penis. He was really average, but he didn't want to show Axel. That fact alone told Roxas that he had it very badly for Axel, because normally he would have just whipped himself out without a care in the world. But he suddenly felt very self-conscious around his bestie. He had only ever been worried about what his past girlfriends thought of him – so this sent alarm bells through his whole being.

Roxas had to grapple with the idea that he was bi… and he was pretty sure he was just bi for his best friend in the whole entire galaxy. What did that mean? That he wasn't _really_ bi? He just wanted Axel? Whatever it _did_ mean, it didn't bode well for him.

Needless to say, he kept the secret to himself. But it was hard, because he got hard too often. The things that had been meaningless little things that they just did on a day-to-day basis became big erotic events that made Roxas retreat into his room to 'study' before he creamed himself.

Sucking food off Axel's fingers made Roxas think of nothing but that massive, glorious cock. Sitting with Axel on the couch, feeling his radiating warmth next to him and bare arms rubbing against his skin got him thinking of Axel's enormous cock. Going out on weekends to skateboard around the parks and watching Axel work up a sweat made Roxas think of, you guessed it, Axel's fucking magnificent cock.

It was driving Roxas crazy and jacking off felt hollow.

He needed something more. He needed Axel's fat wang, even though Roxas had no clue what to do with it if he even had it. So of course, he did 'research.'

What he found enlightened and tortured him because he wanted to do all those things with Axel – or a more correct statement would have been he wanted Axel to do those things to him.

But Roxas valued his relationship – his friendship – with Axel above all else.

They had both dated girls. They both watched porn together and rated the girls in their classes and on their campus on a fuckability scale. They were so hetero it was disgusting. Or at least Roxas had been up until 'the incident' a month ago. But it didn't change anything. Roxas still participated in all the above-listed activities with Axel. It wasn't just for the sake of keeping up appearances either. He still got hard from watching porn. He still found boobs hot, but he was finding himself far more interested in watching Axel's pants grow tight and imagining what biting into that creamy ass must be like.

So Roxas kept torturing himself. But then one day, he decided to do something about his desires and needs. He didn't tell Axel – that would have been crazy. No. Instead he started buying toys. Roxas had never given sex toys much of a thought. He had always been very satisfied with his own hand and a bit of lubricant. Spanking one out once a day in his bed or in the shower had been the norm, but it wasn't cutting it anymore, so he needed some sexual aides. He didn't know what half of them did but decided to spend his hard-earned coffee shop barista money on big dildos, and cock rings, and nipple clamps, and locked himself up inside his room to find out what he liked and how to use everything.

When he got used to the toys, he bought new ones because the satisfaction he got from the old toys lost their sparkling allure. He bought bigger and fatter toys to shove into himself harder and deeper, to scratch at that hollow ache that Axel left in his bones. And it worked for a little while. He had his best friend, he had an impressive array of sex toys, and he was mostly happy.

But then one night, Axel brought a girl home from the bar he worked at, and all the pillows over Roxas' head and headphones on, listening to angry metal, couldn't take away the hurt he felt.

Roxas didn't want to ask Axel about it the next day, but he didn't want to give off like anything was wrong either, so of course he asked how it had been. And as Axel described how tight her pussy had been, and how fucking insane it had been to cum all over her tits, Roxas put himself in place of this harlot and felt miserable for the rest of the day.

When Axel brought the same skank over again that next night, Roxas wanted to murder the bitch. He didn't drown out their sex sounds that time. He listened and fucked himself on his massive dildo and cried out in ecstasy as he came, feeling no shame, only burning hate.

The next day, Axel asked Roxas who he had slept with, and said that Roxas should have told Axel that he had a girl over – he mentioned something about a foursome and high fived Roxas.

Roxas kept up the pretence of screwing a girl for several weeks until he decided to just break up with his imaginary girlfriend. He wanted a reason to be openly miserable. Axel looked after him, wrapping him in blankets, spending time with him on the couch, watching their favorite crappy movies, and whoever the ho was that had taken Axel's attention away from Roxas was forgotten about for a while, which was perfect.

He felt better and cheered up, which then caused Axel to go back to his skank-ho and Roxas' mood plummeted again. But this time he had no explanation for it. Axel just gave him looks and one day announced that he was done seeing bitch-face because he thought Roxas was sad about not having anyone in his life while Axel was off getting laid and being dragged off to social gatherings that weren't really his scene, but that he attended because he was fond of getting laid.

"We'll be bachelors for life. Just you 'n' me," Axel had declared and that only somewhat lifted Roxas' heart. He was touched that Axel would forgo his own happiness to make sure he kept Roxas company, but it just made Roxas fall deeper, which brought with it a new kind of pain.

Was it too soon to say that Roxas loved his best friend? It was definitely a million years too early to tell Axel that he wanted to kiss him, let alone have his brains fucked out by his big dong, and spend the rest of their forevers together. So Roxas kept that to himself and life went on as usual.

* * *

Christmas break came and went. Roxas and Axel parted to visit their respective families, although they talked and messaged each other each day. Roxas sort of hoped that not seeing Axel every day would help him get over his horniness. He definitely didn't obsess over imagining Axel pounding him while he was away from him, so he thought his libido might chill out by the time he went back to his dorm.

But he was wrong. Good God, he was so wrong.

When he came back to his dorm he was greeted by Axel… sporting a tattoo under each eye. Axel had grinned so broadly, cocked his eyebrow, and gave him a smarmy wink and click of the tongue.

"Hey, baby. Like my tats?"

That was the fastest erection Roxas could ever remember getting in his life, and somehow, he had managed to be very relaxed about it. "Super cool, dude. Did it hurt?" He hoped it did because Roxas' erection was agony.

When he finally got the opportunity, he relieved himself the only way he knew how.

From that day forward, looking at Axel was way harder. Roxas just wanted to suck his face off constantly.

He kept trawling around online, looking for new toys to take the edge off, and then looking for things that could just make him stop wanting his best friend so much.

He found something eventually. Some vitamin pills that promised to drop your libido. Of course, he did his research and made sure there was nothing in them that could like… chemically castrate him or something. He still wanted to jack off, but… it was getting ridiculous with how much Axel was on his brain, so he just wanted a timeout from needing to tend to his erection all day, every day.

Pills arrived and early the next morning Roxas was staring at them while hanging out around the kitchen sink with a glass of water in his hand. Did he really need to take these? Surely he could just keep masturbating.

But then Axel walked out of his bedroom, all sleepy, scratching at his head, his other hand scratching at his stomach under his pajama top, and that bit of flesh was all it took to tighten Roxas' gut and penis and make him fantasize about licking him and… Roxas popped the pills in his mouth and swigged down the water.

Axel gave a big yawn and walked over to Roxas, pillowing his sleepy face on top of Roxas' head. "Mornin'," he mumbled, still sounding half asleep.

"Why're you up before noon?" Roxas reached over to drop his glass in the sink and wrapped arms around Axel so he could maneuver the sleepy-head over to the couch, where he gently lowered Axel down.

"Big day. Gettin' fitted for," Axel gave a big yawn, "suit."

"Oh, already? I thought your brother's wedding was like months away still." Roxas pulled Axel's legs up onto the couch and threw a blanket over him.

Tired eyes smiled up at him and Axel smacked his lips with comfortable satisfaction. "Mmm, blanket. But yeah, I told you 'bout this months ago. Wedding's in two weeks."

"Shit, that went fast." Roxas sat down on the edge of the couch. Axel's arm wound around his waist, pulling him close to Axel, as he lay on his side. Roxas' heart was beating wildly. It always did that. He always felt so warm when he was with Axel. He groaned inwardly. He needed these pills to kick in ASAP. He turned on the TV to distract himself from the feel of Axel's morning stiffy pushing against his hip.

Axel hummed and then said, "Can you come with me? I dun wanna be stuck with Reno 'n' Rude all day."

"Sorry, no can do. Work to do." It wasn't a lie, but he certainly would have said yes if the idea of seeing Axel trying on suits wasn't so damn mind-meltingly arousing. Roxas had a thing for Axel in a suit. He had never seen him in one but was 100% certain that it would make his nose bleed.

Axel whined.

They watched morning cartoons. Roxas made Axel breakfast - he made the only thing he couldn't possibly mess up - cereal. He was _really_ bad at cooking.

After breakfast Roxas waved Axel off and rubbed at his own erection, which made him hiss. He figured he'd jack off now and then have the rest of the day to relax and no longer feel the strong pulse and need to cum, thanks to the pills… which would surely take effect soon.

Roxas went for his morning shower, armed with a silicone lubricant and an appropriate butt plug. Lubricant was applied inside and out, toy pushed in slowly, and more lubricant squeezed into his hand so he could go to town on his erection while hot water hit his back. He hummed and sighed. Forearm rested on the shower wall and he buried his head in the crook of his arm as he imagined Axel touching him all over as he pulled at himself in all the ways he liked best.

Warm pleasure built, and he found a really comfortable pace. He imagined kisses raining down on him. He clenched against the full feeling in his anus and hand left his erection to wiggle the plug a little and pull it in and out of himself, brushing past his prostate as much as possible. His breath hitched with every sweep. Hand went back to erection pumping. He alternated. He used both hands.

Eventually, the hot water was all used up, so Roxas – kind of baffled why the water had suddenly turned cold – jumped out, wrapping towel around himself and padded out to the living room.

He caught sight of the time and rubbed at his eyes. It was almost midday… Had he been in the shower for two hours? No. The clock must have been fast. He went into his bedroom to check his phone. The time was the same as in the living room.

Roxas was completely miffed. How had he been stimulating himself for two hours and not come yet? He definitely needed to. The need and urge were sitting in his groin, his butt, his gut. And when he saw the selfie that Axel took and sent to him, showing himself off in a tailored suit, Roxas groaned. Fuck that tight-fitting form, those broad shoulders, and tapered waist, and taut butt, and enormous penis that lay hidden under clinging pants. Curse Axel's sweet smile and his naughty tats.

Roxas discarded his towel, grabbed his water-based lubricant and his suction cup big-as-fuck dildo and slammed it to the ground, where it stood nice and firm. Roxas slathered it in lubricant, took the plug out of his butt, put down some pads for his knees and then lowered himself onto the big intrusion. He moaned with loud, wanton abandon as it stretched him wide and filled him up. Roxas rolled his hips and rode this masterpiece of silicone pleasure the same way he had done so many times previously. This one was by far his favorite. It could make him cum in under a minute if he just angled himself properly.

He angled himself properly and pounded himself, whilst rubbing the head of his penis. He could feel the explosion building, he was ramming himself home. He was _so close_. So, _so close_ … but he never got there. Minutes slipped past. His knees hurt, his thighs ached, his heart raced, and his lungs burned.

Roxas stopped, huffing and groaning. He lifted himself off one final time and fell forward, bracing arms against his hardwood floor and he shouted with outrage into the floorboards, "What the _fuck_!" What the fuck had he done to himself? He had a burning need to cum, but he just… couldn't. Every time he was edging close he lost it. Was it the pills? "Fuck!" he shouted, louder, through grit teeth, thumping fist against the floor.

He got up and stretched the cramp out of his limbs before he went to his big box of toys. He grabbed a fleshlight and a vibrating buttplug. He lay down on his bed and after applying some lubricant, pushed the plug in until he felt it brush against his prostate and turned it on. A shudder of pleasure tingled through his body. He focused on that feeling for a while and once his heart-rate jumped up again and his breathing became a little labored, he pumped himself into the cozy tightness of the fleshlight.

He imagined Axel on top of him, using two hands to stroke himself while he was bouncing up and down on Roxas' erection.

Again, the pleasure built. He could feel his sac tightening. He was so close. He could feel the pulse all through his body. Roxas arched his back. He manually ground the plug into himself, stimulating himself further, and pumping his throbbing shaft in and out of Axel's imagined tightness.

He choked on his cry and… nothing came out. Not from his mouth or his head.

Roxas slumped against his mattress, irritated, horny, and beginning to get pissed off. His ass was starting to hurt. No matter if he put a gallon of lubricant in his hole it still wouldn't help the discomfort.

He tried other toys. Other methods. Nothing worked. But he kept trying. It was like an itch he couldn't scratch, and it just wouldn't go away. He searched the pill's side effects, just in case he had missed something the first three times he had read through it. His symptoms weren't listed – not even in a very vague and ambiguous way. He then searched his particular problem and found no solution. He couldn't even find how long the effects of the pill were supposed to last. But considering that two a day was the recommended dosage Roxas hoped to whatever sick deity was watching out for him and laughing at him, that the effects would be gone by the morning.

Until then all he could do was push things into his ass because if he left it for a few minutes without doing anything the discomfort grew and grew, making him feel like he was about to explode. And because he couldn't it just aggravated him.

Eventually, Roxas heard – much to his simultaneous trepidation and elation – the sound of Axel's jubilant voice, calling out to Roxas, " _Hey buddy, I'm home! Miss me? I got a really cool suit. Not the one I sent you a picture of. It's – ah, I'll just show ya, okay? Lemme get changed into it."_

The hot sweat which had been trickling down Roxas' body from hours of slamming himself onto and into things, turned cold. He couldn't let Axel see him like this! But seeing Axel in a suit was maybe the thing that would finally put Roxas out of his misery. His brain felt like it was mush. He just wanted to cum.

Tears sprung out of his eyes. He didn't know if he was sad, embarrassed, or excited. He just needed to cum, and slowly crawled along the floor to his door, not caring what state Axel saw him in. Not like Roxas could manage to pull pants on anyway. His penis was too sensitive for that.

* * *

Axel ripped into the fancy paper his suit had been wrapped in. Reno had told him not to touch it until the day of the wedding, but screw Reno! Axel was dying to show Roxas. Photos wouldn't have done it justice. Plus, he wanted to see Roxas' face when he saw. He lived to surprise Roxas.

He flung off his clothes and pulled on dress shirt and black suit jacket and pants. The fabric was rigid but luxurious. It was inlaid with red satin and the finest red embroidered patterns that really shone in the light. He had to give it to his brother; Reno had style.

Axel opted to forgo the shoes in this instance, so he walked barefoot out of his bedroom and over to Roxas' door and knocked before he let himself in. They had a rule that if the door wasn't locked it was okay to enter after a knock. So, hearing no protest he pushed the door open.

Roxas' usually-tidy room was in complete disarray. Axel's eyes darted around and landed on Roxas. He inhaled sharply with shock. Roxas was completely naked, sitting on the floor with sunken head, palms of hands pressed against floor and legs in a W at his sides.

"Roxas!" Axel rushed over. He undid his suit jacket and wrapped it over Roxas' shoulders. "What happened? Oh my God! What's wrong? Did someone break in? Did they – did you—?" Axel couldn't finish that word or thought. He would _murder_ whoever laid a finger on his best friend.

Roxas shook his head. "No. I'm so fucking dumb. I bought some pills and took 'em and now I can't…"

Axel was overcome with relief but then… "You took drugs?"

"Not _that_ kind of drugs." Roxas pointed over to his computer desk.

Axel got up and… stepped over… a dildo? Axel kept staring at the rubber phallus as he moved towards the desk. He bumped into it and blindly fumbled for the pill bottle while he noticed not just _one_ dildo… but at least… he counted – ten. What the fuck… Axel turned his head to look at the pills. He read what was on it and it made no sense. "Libido… suppressant? What the hell are these for? Rox, what did you do?" He looked back at Roxas who— "Oh my _God_! What the fuck're you doing?" Axel averted his gaze again because Roxas was masturbating right in front of him.

"I can't cum, Ax," Roxas whined and he sounded completely spent and desperate. "I've tried… I've tried since ten this morning. It fucking burns. It hurts. I feel like I'm gonna implode if I don't fuck myself on something. I needa cum but can't." Roxas sobbed, hand going to the top of his head and gripping at his hair.

Axel felt such overwhelming pain for his best friend, but a quick glance revealed that Roxas was still jerking off and now was pushing something into his ass too. "What can I do to help?"

"N-need— _nothing_. Please – just get outta here." Roxas winced.

But something in his voice made Axel stay. He walked back over to Roxas, kneeling down next to him. Suit jacket was on the floor. Axel rubbed Roxas' bare back. Roxas moaned at the touch.

"Please go. Or I'm—" Roxas huffed.

"Or you're gonna what?"

"Or I'm gonna—" Roxas huffed again and furiously pumped at himself.

Axel felt terrible for taking a peek at Roxas' nakedness. His heart pounded a little quicker than before. Reno's teasing words echoed around Axel's head, ' _Where's your boyfriend today?'_

Reno had always asked that whenever Axel showed up anywhere without Roxas. It hadn't been any different today either. That question certainly never bothered Axel. It bothered him more when he had to go to dumb things like suit-fittings without Roxas tagging along to make fun of him or drop a sneaky compliment. So, Axel would be lying to himself if he never thought of Roxas _like that_. Just in passing – the fleetest of fleeting thoughts. That's all it ever was.

Roxas moaned louder as Axel's hand drifted lower. "Axel," Roxas whined.

"Yeah?"

Roxas suddenly whirled around on his knees facing Axel, with hand on his weeping cock and knees spread far apart. Axel's eyes flew up to the ceiling.

"Look at me," Roxas begged, small but commanding.

Axel lowered his eyes onto Roxas, his gaze fixating on Roxas' eyes.

"Am I disgusting?" Roxas yelled through tears and bitter upset and… maybe even pain?

"No," Axel said meekly, eyes wide, and shaking his head.

"Look at me—all of me and tell me if I'm disgusting!" Roxas ordered. Hand pumped himself furiously. Other hand was behind himself, working whatever dildo Axel had seen on the floor, into himself.

Axel drew his gaze downward taking a purposeful look. Roxas was glazed in sweat. His cheeks were flushed, hair a mess, and body soft yet hard in all the right places. Roxas' hand was still, almost furiously, pumped at himself. Axel perhaps looked at that for the longest moment of all. He had never seen Roxas so naked before. Was it wrong to like it? "No. You're not disgusting." Axel meant it. He brushed at hairs, combing them away from beautiful blue eyes, which looked relieved.

Roxas said nothing though. His eyes just squeezed shut for a moment.

"Is there anything I can get you?" Axel tried again. He wanted to help, desperately so, but had no clue how.

"I need—" Roxas swallowed it down and panted as hand kept working over his shaft.

Axel's eyes flickered down, copping an eyeful. He swallowed the lump in his throat. "Tell me. Whaddya need?"

"I can't ask you," Roxas cried out and head slumped forward against Axel's chest.

"You can. Anything you need. It's yours," Axel pressed on and ran his hand over Roxas' clammy back. He hoped Roxas wouldn't feel the tremble in his unsteady gesture.

Roxas squeaked.

Hand froze. "What?" Axel asked.

"You," Roxas said, urgency in his voice.

"What?" Should that have made sense to him? Axel felt like he was being so thick right now. He could hardly concentrate with Roxas… doing such distracting things. He could feel Roxas' arm movements against himself.

Head raised, pleading eyes looked deep into Axel's soul. "I need _you_. Your _big_ dick. In me. Pounding me." Roxas gulped. "And maybe some water," he said, as an aside. Intense stare finally abating.

That whole request sucked the air right out of Axel. _Water_. Axel could do that. He nodded. "I'll… go get that."

A shaky breath left Roxas and Axel got up, legs almost collapsing underneath his own weight. He took a step, tripped on his suit jacket and fell over, with an 'oof.'

Hands were on him in an instant, making him flinch. "Klutz," came Roxas' affectionate reprimand close to his ear.

Axel flashed a self-deprecating smile, still incredibly mindful of hot hands burning into his sides. At least Roxas looked slightly less sad. That calmed Axel down a little and made him feel happy. But he still needed to get away and get his thoughts in order. He scrambled up. "Water. I'm on it."

Roxas gave a weepy smile up to him before hanging his head and hand going back to jerking himself off.

Axel fled to the safety of the kitchen and gulped down a big glass of water before fetching Roxas' glass.

Roxas had asked Axel to… fuck him. In no uncertain terms. So many questions swam around his head, making him dizzy. Was he okay with this? He didn't know. Roxas… didn't repulse him. Not even a little bit. Maybe even the opposite?

A sharp moan emanated out of Roxas' room. Axel braced himself against the sink with one hand. It had never bothered him to be teased about how much time he spent with Roxas. He never felt self-conscious about how he was with Roxas. So… maybe… if Roxas didn't seem in such desperate discomfort, Axel might even think it kind of hot? A little bit? Roxas's naked body was… something. He could still see Roxas jerking himself off in his mind's eye. Was he okay with that? He had never thought of guys in that way before. Roxas though… this wasn't just _some guy_. This was _Roxas_. His best friend. His needing-sexual-release- _right-now_ best friend. Axel wasn't sure about much, but he knew that he needed… and maybe even _wanted_ to help.

He filled up the glass and brought it back to Roxas' room. Roxas was on his bed now, rocking against… a dildo he had somehow attached to the wall that his bed stood next to. Axel swallowed down the… whatever it was. He didn't know. He was too shocked to see Roxas like this. He had never imagined that—

"Here's your glass." Axel walked over, avoiding stepping on the sex toys, but stepping into cold liquid on the floor. He yelped a bit and jumped. He didn't know if it was lubricant or… his heart raced in response to that. He handed the glass over to Roxas, who pulled off the dildo, crawled over to Axel and chugged down the water in one go. All Axel could do was silently stare.

Roxas sighed out with satisfaction when he was done and put the glass onto his bedside stand and then sat back on his haunches.

Axel sat down on the edge of Roxas' bed, giving him cautious glances.

"Thank you," Roxas said.

"You're welcome. That kinda request I can fill easy." He smiled. His heart revved up a gear.

"You could also fill me real easy—sorry! Sorry! I didn't mean… I know I'm disgusting. I'm just so fucking – desperate right now. I just," Roxas groaned and hastily took a deep breath. "I'm sorry that I told you, but you wanted to know." Roxas pulled at his hair with one hand and then resumed tugging on himself with the other.

"Why're you doing that?" Axel cocked an eyebrow with worry and tilted his head towards Roxas' predicament without directly looking. He still felt like he was intruding and… it just made him really uncomfortable.

"It's the only way to get some relief from this… nnghg – pressure. If I stop I feel sick, or like I'm gonna burst – burst somewhere with no outlet. Everythin' just hurts down here." Roxas motioned to his nether region and winced.

"So… this… wanting me to…" Axel took a deep breath, "fuck you… that's just 'cause I'm here and your best friend and it's convenient, right?" Axel's gut knotted a little at that thought.

Roxas cried out with exasperation and jerked off a little harder for a fraction of a moment. "No," he winced.

 _No_? Axel was dumbfounded. "But you're straight."

"I'm bi."

Bi? Roxas swung both ways? "Huh? Since when?"

Eyes darted. "Since I saw your big fucking cock last year. I bought all these dildos but they're not big enough. They aren't _you_." Voice was shrill and high pitched, before calming a little and continuing on, saying, "I'm so sorry. I'm disgusting. I know I'm disgusting. I shouldn't be fantasizing about my bestie – wanting you all to myself."

A gentle little, "Aww," fell out of Axel. That tugged right at his heart, which was still racing around, but also thumping a little firmer. "You want me?" he smiled a little, feeling himself fill up with a very deep warmth.

"I _need_ you," Roxas stressed, lifted his backside off the bed and backed up to slide himself onto the dildo, which was suction-cupped to the wall. He sighed with relief.

Axel could feel his cheeks reddening with the sudden want to be the reason Roxas sighed out like that.

"I've been thinking about you like this for way – too – fucking – long." Roxas thrust himself off and on with each word. "But I get I'm gross. I know you don't want to do this with me – but, fuck – I – need – you." He panted and stopped thrusting for a moment. "So, I guess I might as well ask. You said you wanted to help." Roxas managed to dredge up a weak smile from somewhere and then resumed his pounding.

Axel stared at Roxas, desperately pleasuring himself. Skin was slick with moisture, muscles rippled and worked hard. Axel grew aware of the throb in his groin. He nearly forgot to respond, "Uh – Do you think it will help?"

"I fucking hope so."

Axel chewed his lip a little and thought about Roxas' request while the bed shook with Roxas' thrusts. He liked Roxas – if Roxas had been a girl—no, that didn't even warrant a thought. Axel didn't want Roxas to be a girl. He supposed therein lay his answer. "If I do this with you—"

Roxas stopped and stared. "You what? You'd really do it?"

There was one fear that Axel couldn't shake. "If I do this with you will it change anything between us? I don't wanna lose my best friend." That thought made his insides knot up uncomfortably. He couldn't imagine his life without Roxas in it. He could barely remember what life had been like _before_ he had met Roxas.

"I'll always be your best friend. I swear." Roxas looked very stern. And if he hadn't been completely naked, attached to a dildo stuck to the wall, Axel might have felt the gravity of Roxas' words, but as it stood – right now – Roxas just made Axel laugh.

"Hey, quit laughin' at me!" Roxas threw a plastic sex toy at Axel, making him yelp.

"Gross, man! It's all… sticky!" He picked it up gingerly between fingertips and flicked it back towards Roxas, hitting him in the arm. Roxas laughed and then winced, and then huffed.

"You okay?" Axel asked, leaning in, wanting to make sure Roxas was all right.

"Yeah. God, please don't make me laugh. Everything hurts." Roxas' palm covered Axel's face and pushed him away.

"Sorry." Axel pulled Roxas' hand off his face and held him, rubbing his thumb over the back of Roxas' hand. He became aware again of his heart racing. He had never been this intimate with Roxas… this felt _very_ intimate. It took his breath away a little. "So whaddya want me to do first?"

Roxas stared and then swallowed hard, "You're really gonna go ahead with this?"

He nodded. "You need me."

"But – you're straight."

"And you're also my best friend. What's your point?"

That made Roxas smile but it looked sad and pained nonetheless.

Axel took a deep breath. He was really going to do this for his best friend. He felt a ripple of excitement flow through him. Would it be bad to enjoy himself when Roxas was suffering so badly? "Whaddya want me to do first?" he asked. Baby steps… that's what he needed to take.

"Get naked and," Roxas rumbled deeply as he pushed back against the wall, "get hard."

* * *

Roxas vowed to himself that he would never take those accursed pills ever again. The discomfort had been going on in his body for so long now that it was excruciating. It's the only reason he had unlocked his door, allowing Axel to let himself in – because Roxas knew Axel would do that. Roxas had seriously considered that he might die and didn't want to let the chance fade away that maybe – just _maybe_ – he would, by some miracle, be able to lay eyes on Axel's nakedness one final time before his passing.

And now was this miracle, so surely death was imminent, and because of this fact he was determined to make the most of this.

Roxas drank up the sight of Axel reluctantly stripping down before him – sure, his back was turned, and his motions agonizingly slow. It was _almost_ like a strip-tease, though Axel was probably focused on not wrinkling his nice new suit – and it _had_ been nice – from what little Roxas had seen of it. But the truth was that Axel looked even nicer with nothing on. His back was broad, and those muscles were gorgeous. And that butt!

Roxas stopped his stimulation, too caught up in looking at bare flesh in the warm light of his bedroom. _His bedroom_. Axel was naked in _his_ bedroom. Death would definitely be moments away and Roxas needed to act fast, so he crawled towards Axel and reached out with a shaky hand. His fingertips pressed into where back met buttock. He ran his fingers down slowly, over the firm curve of Axel's tight ass. His mouth watered. He wanted to gnaw and lick and probe.

Roxas looked up and his hand quickly dropped away when he saw Axel looking down at him over his shoulder.

"Sorry," Roxas quickly muttered.

Axel shook his head a little. "'S fine. Uh… s-so I got naked. That was the easy part," Axel laughed, nervousness present in his voice and in the way he kept himself from turning around. "The getting hard part might be a bit of a problem though."

Roxas had feared that. It's what he needed the most and it was what wouldn't happen because Axel was too weirded out by this. "I'm sorry. You don't have to—"

"No!" Axel glared and swiftly spun around, giving Roxas an eyeful of lengthy cock before he bent down and slammed palms of his hands against mattress, making Roxas bounce a little. "You need me. I'm gonna do this for you." Determination blazed in Axel's eyes.

"Oh." Roxas' heart fluttered, and he wished he could appreciate the beauty of their friendship more, but right now his body had a desperate need.

Flash of courage seemed to leave Axel, and his eyes fell away again. "I… might just – need some help though. It's… not 'cause you're disgusting or anything. 'S just 'cause… this is weird and… sudden, y'know."

Roxas' stomach twisted. "Let me – I want to try and help you so you can help me."

Axel nodded. "So—" he drew out.

"So… sit back on my bed and," Roxas swallowed down the massive lump in his throat, "let me see what I can do." The air seemed too thin. Roxas found it hard to breathe right now with how excited he was getting. The pleasant buzz negated some of the discomfort pinching and squeezing his nerves.

Axel nodded and mounted Roxas' bed, crawling over to pillows where he turned around and flopped down, in a slightly upright, lounging position.

Roxas drank up the sight of his best friend, completely naked and glorious. Limbs seemed longer and more graceful. And that also went for Axel's cock. It was still as long and fat as he had remembered seeing it so many months ago. It still made his mouth water. He was staring. He couldn't stop staring.

Axel's fingers flexed and picked at the cotton sheets. Roxas tore his eyes away and worried about how uncomfortable Axel seemed. He felt sorry for him and wished all this would have happened differently… but then if it wasn't for Roxas' desperate need right now it probably would never have happened either.

Roxas shook his head clear of those thoughts. He scooched closer to Axel, tapping his legs. Axel moved and spread his legs apart so Roxas could nestle in closer. Roxas ran palms of his hands up legs and thighs, staring at Axel's flaccid-but-no-less-beautiful-and-tasty-looking penis. It was hanging down between his legs. Roxas marveled at it and wanted to know how big it got when fully erect – in his ass. The moan left him involuntarily.

"Everything okay?" Axel asked, sounding breathless.

Roxas nodded and bent down while keeping eye contact with Axel. He ran one of his trembling hands over Axel's shaft, fingertips tickling Axel's head and pressing against his slit when he got there. A shiver ran through Roxas.

Axel gulped.

"Tell me if it gets weird and you want to stop," Roxas said, chest heaving.

"It's weird now, but… I don't want you to stop," Axel husked.

A flutter ran through Roxas and they shared a small smile. Roxas nodded and used both hands to lift Axel's heavy shaft to his mouth. His whole body buzzed and trembled with nervous anticipation and need. He stuck his tongue out and pressed it to Axel's slit and licked.

A silent breath left Axel and his fingers kept tensing and relaxing. His eyes were on Roxas and Roxas could see him continue to swallow nervously.

Roxas told himself that it would be okay. Axel would relax soon enough, and then Roxas could relax too. He dropped his eyes away from Axel and focused on the man's groin. He studied the red happy trail and the way soft, round belly raised and fell with every one of Axel's breaths.

Roxas opened his mouth wide and slid Axel carefully into himself, inch after inch. He only worked a little of Axel into his mouth before the head of the penis hit his throat. That's where Roxas left it for now and focused on sucking and rubbing Axel into an aroused state.

Axel gave huffy pants with each one of Roxas' sucks. Penis began hardening and Roxas's stomach tightened and his chest felt so warm and brimming with happiness. He sucked harder, took Axel a little deeper every couple of sucks and head bobs later.

Before too long Roxas had all of Axel in his mouth and down his throat. He had practised on his biggest dildos, because he had thought it might one day come in handy, and today was that auspicious day.

Axel was a stream of pleasurable expletives. Every time he said, "Oh God, Roxas!" Roxas felt himself get a little harder. It was painful, but in this instance Roxas loved it too.

Roxas pushed down against Axel's hips, to stop him from pushing up and further into Roxas, while he vigorously deep-throated and hummed with his own pleasure and pain. Roxas wanted to keep going – he wanted to swallow Axel as he creamed into Roxas' mouth, but his ass was beginning to burn with need, so he pulled off, panting, and Axel whined, his eyes fluttering open and dopey smile of desire painting his face and making him absolutely adorable.

"I need you," Roxas pleaded, pawing and kneading at pale thighs and reminding Axel of why they were here.

That seemed to snap Axel out of it. "Oh shit. Yeah." He hummed. "Shit, Rox." A groan left Axel as he sat up. "You're amazing."

They were nearly nose to nose. Roxas wanted to kiss Axel so badly – but they were just having sex. Axel was just here to help out a friend. "Please," Roxas croaked and moved away a little to get distance between himself and completely kissable lips. He rolled over, prostrating himself but with knees under him so his ass was held up to Axel invitingly.

Axel cleared his throat. "I, er… I've never done this before. Shouldn't I wear a condom or something?"

Roxas groaned, frustrated. "Yeah, okay. Go get one, but, fuck, hurry, okay?" Roxas reached back around and rubbed his finger against his asshole, needing friction and stimulation right now. He pushed in a little with his finger and felt around for his prostate.

Axel didn't move. Instead, Roxas heard a sharp inhale of breath and then a, "Fuck it. I'll just go in bareback. You're clean right? Got tested?"

That shook Roxas to his core. Finger slipped out and he looked behind himself at Axel hovering behind him. It was such a wet-dream-come-true sight. "Yeah. 'M all good."

"Cool. Me too. So… whaddya need me to do?" Hands were already gripping Roxas' ass, roving up and down.

Roxas lost the plot for a second. Hands on him like this were heavenly. Fingers kept stroking. Roxas heard his name be called out gently, which shook him out of the trance. "Uh, just lube up and go to town on my ass. You don't need to stretch me. I'm ready to go." Roxas couldn't believe he was having this conversation with Axel. He could feel the pre-come oozing out of him. It was such a promising sign. Hardly a drop had left him over the last too-many-hours, except if he had thought about Axel really hard.

Hands regrettably left and Axel shuffled away a bit. Roxas listened to the wet sound of Axel spreading the liquid between his fingers. A few moments later and Roxas gasped as warm hardness brushed his backside and wet hands returned to his ass. His legs shook a little, tears welled at corners of his eyes.

"Ready?" Axel asked, sounding tentative and unsure. He was probably asking himself more so than Roxas.

Roxas thumped a fist against his bed. "I've been ready for months. I want your big fucking fuck in me Axel. Please don't make me beg more." At this point Roxas didn't care if he had to beg more. He just needed and wanted Axel pushing into and stretching him wide open.

Axel chuckled, and it sounded halfway to his normal self. Cold fingers stroked Roxas' cheeks, spreading them a little. "I just… push in? It won't hurt you?"

Roxas' insides screamed at himself. Axel was so sweet, but he just needed to be fucked right now. "It's gonna be the best fucking feeling in the world. Just do it!" he snapped and whined all at once.

Axel laughed low in his throat and quickly said, "Okay."

The next thing Roxas felt was Axel pushing into him and Roxas wailed from the core of his soul as he was gratifyingly spread open and filled up to the brim. "Don't fucking stop" he screamed and pounded the mattress as Axel's motion slowed down. Roxas' warning seemed to spur Axel on. Roxas took more of Axel's cock and Roxas barely heard the satisfying moan over his own guttural exclamations.

Axel's groin butted up to Roxas' backside and both men panted harshly.

"Fuck, this feels… this feels—" Axel started pulling out and moaned some more. His hands gripped Roxas' rump harder.

Roxas' body had pins and needles running through his everything. He shuddered with every deep thrust into himself and relished the fat stretch. Axel's cock was so big – it felt like it was halfway up inside himself.

"You're so – tight." Axel whined with pleasure and his skin slapped against Roxas' backside repeatedly as he rocked harder and faster.

Roxas whimpered into his sheets. His eyes leaked from amazement at having Axel inside himself after so many fucking months of pathetically fucking himself and wishing for this moment. It was incredible, and he felt himself edging closer to his relief… for probably the fiftieth time today. But this time it would surely come. _He_ would surely cum.

Hands gripped Roxas' hips tightly. Axel rammed himself deeper but thrust shallower, not drawing himself out more than an inch or two. He was furiously humping into Roxas' backside. A string of vowels left his throat. Fingernails dug, Axel grunted and with one more thrust shuddered violently. Roxas gasped as he felt himself somehow feeling even fuller and then he knew that Axel had cum inside of his ass. It made him so happy – so horny. A shiver ran up his spine, but he was still frustrated.

Axel's chest pressed to Roxas' back. Harsh breaths tickled Roxas' skin, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

"I'm so sorry," Axel huffed over and over again. "It was so good – I'm so sorry." Satisfied exhaustion clung heavily to his words.

Roxas couldn't bring himself to be mad. "It's okay," he sighed with resignation and began tugging at himself. He squeezed his insides against Axel's length. Axel moaned and slowly slipped out and off Roxas.

Roxas lifted himself up and turned around to face Axel, who was positively glowing with rosy cheeks and the happiest smile on his face. That expression gripped Roxas' heart. He wanted to hug and cuddle post-climax Axel and fall asleep in his arms. But he couldn't. For one, his predicament would just leave him in agony if he stopped trying to satisfy himself. And secondly, they weren't boyfriends. His heart cried out a little.

"I'm so sorry," Axel said again, smile vanishing.

Roxas shrugged.

"Did it feel good though? Were you close?"

"I… it was so good. If it wasn't for these fucking pills I would have cum when you pushed in. Thanks for trying with me though." Roxas smiled but he felt too sad and maddened with these feelings in his body to impart much joy to his face.

"We're not done trying yet, are we?" Axel huffed, still catching his breath.

Hope fluttered and Roxas perked up at that. "Oh? Y-you wanna keep trying?"

"Fuck yes!" Axel grinned. Previous shyness and uncertainty seemed to have left him with his orgasm. "Just – I need a bit to recover, but maybe I can suck your dick while we wait?"

Roxas' eyes lit up at that news. He nodded eagerly and got up.

"Where're you going?"

"Grabbing some toys for you to shove into me. I, like, need front 'n' back to relieve the pressure," he stated matter-of-factly. It had been going for so long now he sadly felt like an expert in this subject.

"Oh."

Roxas grabbed a handful of dildos and vibrating plugs, dumped them on the bed next to Axel and then laid himself down, back propped up against pillows so he could watch Axel, comfortably, in this uncomfortable situation.

Axel looked at the things on the bed and then at Roxas. "I can put any of these things into you?"

"Yeah."

Axel suddenly leaned forward, cupping Roxas' chin, and half-lidded eyes darted over Roxas' face. "I never knew you were so kinky."

His stomach fluttered. "Do you like it?"

Axel's lips parted. Soft breath caressed Roxas' cheeks. "You're full of surprises."

"So are you," Roxas sighed out and bit his lip to stop himself from diving in and mauling Axel with kisses. But that action seemed to draw Axel's attention.

He leaned even closer. He thumbed over Roxas' lips, now looking at them with worry and murmured, "I can't believe you fit all of me in you. Especially with how small your mouth is."

A jolt of desire ran through Roxas. He licked his lips and batted his eyelashes at Axel. "I practiced on this thing." Roxas grabbed at the silicone toy he had mentioned and dropped it back on the bed.

Axel's eyes went wide. "You weren't kidding when you said you've been thinking about me for a while, huh."

"Nope." There was agony in his word.

"Why? I seriously turned you gay?"

"It's bi, and you didn't turn me anything. Now c'mon. Please." Roxas rocked his hips up, refocusing them both.

Axel let go of Roxas and slowly scooched back, whilst simultaneously descending on him. "Sorry if this sucks, I've only had vag," he apologized.

"As long as _you_ suck you won't disappoint," Roxas reassured with a small laugh.

Axel chuckled and hummed.

Roxas, despite the deep discomfort, loved not being alone. He loved having his best friend here to support him and joke with. It had been a very lonely and – honestly – frightening few hours for him. At least he wasn't going to die alone now.

That thought evaporated as Axel's fingertips explored Roxas' hot flesh. He gasped in a whispered hush. Digits traced his shaft. Roxas watched closely, not caring if he looked dumb with his mouth hanging open like it was. Roxas squirmed and mewled as fingers ran over his swollen head, rubbed his slit, and followed the vein back down his shaft. Cool hand cupped Roxas' sac.

"God, man. You're burning up down here. You sure I shouldn't take you to a hospital?" Green eyes were filled with worry as they looked up at him.

Roxas' eyes flew wide open. That was the first he had thought about needing actual medical attention. "Should you? I don't know. I… I think I'll be okay? You think I should go?"

Axel looked between penis and Roxas' face a few times. "Well… I don't know. You – I don't know what normal is for other guys – but you _look_ normal? It's not like you're weirdly swollen or anything. Just… hot…" A glimpse of a smirk quirked on his lips.

"You think I'm hot," Roxas teased, flirtation quelling his anxiety.

Axel gave a non-committal hum and then bent down and took Roxas in without warning, making Roxas gasp and whimper in quick succession.

Axel's sucks and tongue-work were sloppy at first but so good. Roxas forced his eyes open because he needed to see red hair bobbing up and down on his overly stimulated erection. Long fingers were sweeping and stroking Roxas' hip and thigh. Axel got into a rhythm after maybe half a minute and even hummed. The so-good blowjob turned into a screamer of a blowjob.

Roxas finally knew what all that loud noise had been about back when Axel had been seeing that homewrecker. The hairs on the back of Roxas' neck stood up. A wondering whisper accosted Roxas' brain; was Axel enjoying himself? Did he like doing this to Roxas? Would he ever consider doing this with Roxas again, if he survived his ordeal? Roxas hoped so as he clutched bedsheets and pushed himself deeper into Axel's moist heat.

"Can you," Roxas squeezed out breathlessly.

Mouth kept sucking and massaging Roxas. Green eyes looked up in wonder. Roxas wanted to come into Axel's mouth so badly. He wanted Axel to guzzle down everything he gave. He cursed inside his head that he couldn't. "Fuck," he drew out with building agony and pointed at the toys. "Put something in me. Fuck, please. And – and don't look at me like that. You're so fucking sexy," Roxas groaned into his arm.

The chuckle around his shaft sent his stomach into a small spasm. Roxas thumped his fist against the mattress.

Axel lifted off Roxas. Roxas groaned with displeasure.

"Sexy, huh?" Axel said, seductive rumble shaking Roxas and he wished Axel would do that while on his cock.

"Just put something in me!" he whined.

Axel did – after he put some lubricant on the butt plug.

Sigh seeped out of Roxas as comforting stretch took the edge off. Axel began sucking on him again and moved the toy in and out.

"Can you – to the left – no, no, _other left_." Roxas sighed "Right – ngh – there – _fuck_!" He whined and squirmed with every brush of hardness against his prostate. The warmth around his penis, the suction, the stimulation – why wasn't it enough? But fuck it also felt so good. So much better than a fleshlight. "More, more!" he begged and groaned. He fucking loved Axel's fingers, and mouth, and Axel. He just fucking loved him.

Heat left Roxas shaft, making him choke with indignant ecstasy and cry out, "Don't stop!"

Axel leaned forward. He pushed against Roxas, cheek to cheek, and breathed into his ear, "Say that again?"

Roxas' breath ran ragged. What was Axel on about? "Don't stop."

"No, not that."

"Fuck. Ax – please." He didn't know what Axel was after. "I'm begging. Just please."

Axel huffed with laughter – or maybe it was a sigh. But then the words Roxas was Ted to hear most tumbled out, "I'm hard again."

Sure enough hard length rubbed against Roxas' leg, making Roxas whimper with hope and excitement.

"Lube," Roxas murmured.

"Already done. Let me fuck you – like this."

Roxas stopped his attempt at rolling over. "Like… this?" He looked at Axel, who was so close that vibrant red hair and warm, inviting scent invaded his vision and senses, leaving no room for anything else.

Axel hummed and then Roxas felt it, a press of lips and the smacking sound of a small kiss to the base of Roxas' ear. And it didn't stop there. More kisses came – little pecks flowing over his cheek and towards Roxas' mouth as Axel shifted.

Hand maneuvered Roxas' leg out to the side. Axel's thighs pushed against him, fingers fumbled, toy was removed, which made Roxas whimper but then seconds later he moaned as the head of Axel's penis found it's nark and replaced the plugs pleasure with something infinitely bigger and hotter. Roxas' pleased cry was swallowed up by Axel's lips brushing against his own. A gasp of needy satisfaction opened Roxas' mouth up further. Axel's tongue ran over his lips and teeth and then delved inside as Roxas continued to whimper and squirm with the gratifying feeling of being filled by the one person he cared for the most.

Roxas wrapped his arms around Axel's torso, and his legs around Axel's waist, opening himself up, sending Axel further into himself, pushing him down and – Roxas gave a sharp yelp into Axel's mouth.

Axel pulled off, startled, "You okay?"

"Yes, fuck, _yes_. Right _there,_ Axel. Right-fucking- _there. More!_ " he begged and squeezed and bucked.

A guttural sound left Axel and he hummed, kissing Roxas fiercely and rolled his hips with startling strength and precision.

Way-too-familiar pressure built inside of Roxas again. He kissed Axel back, completely starved for his best friend's affection. Tongues wrestled together, hands gripped each other, needy. Roxas was sure both their knuckles were turning white with the ferocity of their hold. Hips hammered, penis exerted relentless friction against the place where Roxas needed it the most.

Roxas had to break their kiss. He couldn't breathe, huffing to the point of near-hyperventilation. He tried to suck in air, while he focused on the epic wave of pressure in his groin and backside. His body physically buzzed, and his extremities began tingling all over. "Oh, God!" he cried.

Axel sucked on Roxas' neck, his grip on Roxas was like heavenly death.

Roxas wailed, "So. Fucking. _Close_ ," in agony and ecstasy.

Axel wordlessly grunted, let go of Roxas, leaned up and braced his hands on the wall opposite of himself. He roared and slammed his hips into Roxas, jackhammering with tremendous force and effort. Roxas flung arms above himself, also bracing against the wall to not have his head crack into it with how hard Axel was fucking him.

Spot was hit, fierce and brutal, over and over again. It fucking hurt, it was the fucking _best_. Axel was so thick, making Roxas full to the brim in his ass and in his heart. He suddenly felt his chest inflate, sucking in all the air of the room. His whole being trembled and seized up. Muscles clamped down in the worst cramp he had ever experienced. A second later all air rushed out of Roxas' lungs and body.

In a howling shout, agonizing pleasure was released. Sticky, hot liquid shot out, like a cork on a bottle that had been shaken too much. Every erratic pulse of Roxas' body pushed more out, releasing wave after wave of unbridled ecstasy through his shaft and backside - up and down his limbs, and through his core.

He shuddered and clenched against the insane pleasure, muttering wordless and nonsensical things and heard Axel's cry, as if through thick cotton. Faint feeling of being filled up and spilling out was overshadowed by the surge of pleasure still spurting and pumping out of him. Hot pools gathered on and slid down his stomach and chest. Roxas shuddered with the tensing and releasing of his muscles and then after the incredible climax, smaller shudders wracked through him, sending tiny tingles all over and throughout his body.

Roxas pried his eyes open, catching sight of chest heaving above him as Axel was still braced against the wall above Roxas' head, arms shaking, sweat dripping, and Axel huffing, puffing, and smiling down at him.

Roxas' insides clenched for a different reason that time. He wanted to reach up, but his arms had lead in them.

"You good?" Axel asked, voice straining through heavy breathing.

"..." Roxas cleared his throat and tried again, "Yeah," voice scratched but he managed to get it out, and the smile did not leave his face or soul.

Axel's smile grew wider. His beautiful eyes trailed over Roxas, and Roxas couldn't find it in himself to be ashamed. He wondered what would happen from here on out though. His chest heaved. There still didn't seem to be enough air in the room to satisfy him. "Come lay down here with me," he tried cautiously, after a few puffing moments. If Axel didn't run away it would be a good sign.

Axel kept huffing and took a moment before he said, "If I do I might never get up again."

Pleasant shiver stirred in Roxas' body, which was still being wracked by the aftershocks of his violent climax. "I could live with that."

Amused quirk of lips was followed by a, "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Why's that?"

"Because you're my best friend."

"Ah. So, nothing to do with you loving me?" Axel grinned and winked.

The shock of his secret not being a secret froze Roxas. "W-what?" he stuttered out.

Head tilted adorably and full of cheek. "You don't?"

"I-I…" Roxas' mind was too fuzzy to think or do words.

Axel slowly lowered himself, which was when Roxas noticed that… Axel was still inside him. He clenched his insides. Axel stopped a fraction and then rumbled pleasantly before sitting down on his haunches, between Roxas' legs.

"You ever going to pull that out or am I stuck like this?" Roxas moved his hips a tiny bit. His body still felt way too heavy and truth be told he never wanted Axel's penis to leave him.

"I'll stay like this until I hear you say it again." Axel chuckled low in his throat.

"Hear what again?"

"That you love me."

There it was again. He gave Axel a questioning look. "Again?"

"Yeah. You said you loved me when I was sucking you off. Will I only hear it if I do that to you?" Axel leaned forward a little, as if to give Roxas another blowjob.

As much as Roxas craved that idea his body couldn't handle it right now. "Please, don't. I can't… my body—" he winced.

Axel stopped and gave him a soft smile, instead rubbing his hand up and down Roxas' thigh. "So, do you?"

Was that what Axel had meant before? Heated embarrassment stirred and prickled Roxas' cheeks. Not that they weren't already rosy and hot from their fucking. "..." Voice gave out again. He cleared his throat. There was nothing to hide now. If Axel was upset, he wouldn't be toying with him like this. Roxas nodded a little. The words that he had wanted to utter every time Axel made him laugh, or cooked him a meal, or smiled at him, finally tumbled out. "I love you."

Axel's chest heaved, and he took a deep breath in. "Oh good. I thought maybe it was just you being high on your drugs and needing to cum that made you say it."

Roxas managed to raise his hand up and his fingertips sought out Axel's hand. Axel obliged and interlaced their fingers together.

"No. I love you. I want you like this 'cause I love you."

"So not just 'cause of my massive dong?" Axel huffed with laughter and bucked his hips.

Despite Axel being soft he was still in Roxas. He was just that big. "Your huge dick helps, but… no. You're not my BFF because of that. Will you ever pull out?"

"But I'm so comfy." Axel leaned forward and lay down half on top of Roxas and half lying beside him. He hummed in contentment.

Roxas huffed and rolled his eyes but was smiling.

"I love you too," Axel said quietly, nuzzling into Roxas' hair.

Roxas squeezed Axel's hand and turned his head to face him. "Yeah?" he said, looking into green eyes sitting above sexy tats.

"Yeah. That's the thing about BFF. It can be best friend forever, or… boyfriend forever." Axel gave Roxas the shyest little smile. "And – I want you to be both."

Roxas whimpered a little. That was so sweet. "I'd squish-hug you if my body wasn't completely dead."

"Oh no! You can't be dead. Where'm I gonna stick my dick?"

"Not into necrophilia?" Roxas giggled.

"Well… only if it's with you." Axel pushed his hips against Roxas again.

"You really gotta stop that. Out. Out." Roxas lifted his hips a little, as strength was slowly returning and squeezed, making Axel moan.

"But I love it when you do that," came the protest.

"C'mon, man."

"All right, all right. I know when I'm not wanted." Axel lifted his hips, sliding out but then pressed himself right back down again, weighty limbs draping over Roxas comfortably.

Roxas actually regretted Axel pulling out. He hadn't realized how nice the full feeling had been until it was gone. But he refused to let Axel know. "Thank you. Kiss?" He made lips at Axel, who obliged him.

Axel's hand slid down Roxas' body, smearing semen everywhere and a little sound of complaint left him.

"What are you whining about?" Roxas playfully grumbled.

"You're hot like this, but also kinda gross," Axel said and they both giggled.

"I'll go have a shower when I can move again."

"Can I join you?"

That thought was so enticing. "Yeah, but you have to feed me before that. I haven't eaten since breakfast."

Axel gasped. "How haven't you wasted away already?"

"Thinking about you sustained me. —Well, I mean it also made me really hungry, but I'm satisfied now."

Axel head-butted Roxas with affection. "I didn't know how hungry I was for you either until today." To prove his point Axel started kissing Roxas with a lot of affection and need, pushing his way in and sucking on Roxas' tongue.

Embers of desire began to light up in Roxas' gut, but he didn't know how. He was so spent. He tried to push at Axel, which did make the other man stop.

Quizzical look was thrown at Roxas.

"I can't, Ax. Not right now. Feed me, wash me. Maybe I'll come back to life then."

"All right, zombie boy. I'll tend to you like a half wilting plant."

"Please don't. I see what happens to the plants your mom gives you," he said woefully.

"If you talked to them nicer they would survive." Axel gave Roxas a self-righteous, snooty pout.

"They're your plants," Roxas protested.

"And now you're my boyfriend, so they're half yours."

Roxas laughed. "Don't retroactively pin your plant deaths on me."

"I already did though. There's nothing you can do about it."

Roxas glared playfully and Axel smirked. Both their smiles mellowed out after a moment.

Axel's fingertips brushed at Roxas' hair. "I'm glad this still feels the same."

Roxas nodded. He knew exactly what Axel was on about. "Same. Nothing's changed."

"Everything's just better," Axel finished the sentiment that sat in Roxas' heart.

Roxas hummed, they shared another kiss and then Axel sat up with a slight groan. "God, I'm gonna be so sore tomorrow."

"Ha! Listen to you complaining. You didn't spend the last seven hours slamming yourself on plastic dicks."

"If you had called me you wouldn't have had to do it for so long." Axel cocked an eyebrow and threw him a look over his shoulder.

"Don't patronize me. How was I supposed to know that you'd fuck me if I asked?"

"You're my bestie."

"Which is why I couldn't ask." Roxas tilted his head and frowned at his mattress.

Fingers cupped his face, shifting and inviting Roxas to look back up at Axel. "Well, you can ask any time now and know that I love you and would do anything for you."

That coaxed the smile out of Roxas. "Ditto."

"Oh good. I was hoping you'd say that. I need a favor." Fingers brushed over Roxas' lips.

Roxas snorted. "A favor? What kinda favor?"

"Will you be my plus-one at Reno's wedding? I was gonna ask you anyway, but now I definitely need you to come with me, so I can kiss you right in front of him when he makes a comment about you being my boyfriend."

Roxas began giggling, which turned into a belly laugh. Axel had told Roxas about the 'boyfriend' thing. At first, he had just shrugged it off. Then after 'the incident' Roxas had tried to ignore it, and now… now… "Yeah, sure. Sounds like a great plan," Roxas eventually burbled out through his remaining titters.

Axel beamed, smiling from ear to ear. "Awesome." His fingers raked over Roxas' body, tickling him slightly with the gentleness of it all.

Roxas shivered. He was still completely wrecked and must have looked it, because Axel asked, "How're you coping? Was that the best orgasm you ever had? Can I take all the credit?"

"It was… the worst and best orgasm I've ever had. You were the best bit, and the pills the worst."

The compliment seemed to inflate Axel, but then his satisfied smirk faltered a little and he cautiously queried, "What're you gonna do with the pills?"

"No!" Roxas struggled but managed to sit himself up. "No! We are _not_ keeping them!"

"Oh, c'mon. It might be fun to fuck like this again one day."

Mouth hung open. "You can't be serious. I'm never taking them again."

"Maybe I'll take them then. See how many times I can make you cum before I do," Axel winked and darted in, stealing a kiss from Roxas.

Roxas' hand went to the back of Axel's neck and held him in the kiss a few fractions longer before releasing him. "I love you too much to torture you like that."

"Aww, my heart. You're too sweet. —What about a half-dose?" Axel grinned.

"Maybe," Roxas muttered, but then took a double-take and slapped Axel's shoulder. "No. No taking the evil pills!"

Axel laughed, caught Roxas' hand and said, "Okay, okay. We'll toss 'em. Probably gonna kill ourselves if we keep having sex like we just did anyway. My heart's still going." Axel pressed palm of Roxas' hand to his chest. There was a very steady, hard thump reverberating. "Oh wait, no. That's not the sex. That's just from how I feel about you." Axel squeezed Roxas' hand gently.

An involuntary whimper left Roxas.

Their fingers tangled together, and they looked at each other with loving smiles.

Roxas had never known Axel to be so mushy. It melted his heart. "I love you," he said, choking on his emotion.

Axel groaned. "I don't think I'll ever get sick of hearing you say that."

"Good," Roxas said quietly. "I'm never gonna stop saying it." Tears of joy were beginning to tickle corners of his eyes.

Axel cupped Roxas' face and they shared another kiss, and when lips parted again Axel asked, "The pills weren't all that bad though, right? Something good came out of them."

Roxas' insides fluttered. He nodded. "Yeah. It sure did."

Foreheads pressed together, hands were clasped, and fingers entangled.

"Ax," Roxas mumbled.

"Yeah, babe?"

"I'm really hungry." As if to emphasize his statement, Roxas' stomach rumbled loudly.

Axel laughed. "Okay. I'll run you a bath and make us some dinner, and then maybe you'll feel alive again to give me another blowjob. I can't believe you fit me all in." He was still astounded.

Roxas smiled and blushed. "Okay, but you gotta do me too."

"Of course. You're gonna be my dessert."

Roxas giggled but it was swallowed up by another round of impassioned kissing.

* * *

 **Author Comment:** This was a oneshot for AkuRoku Day 2018. Please leave some comments/remarks/love if you enjoyed :) Also... there _might_ be a follow up to this for next years AkuRoku day ;)

Kunoichi21 beta'd this story for me. You can find her beta profile on FFdotNET


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